Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Somewhere There is a Happy Affair, a Ghost of a Good Mood

I went into Border's today to fill out some paperwork. I start training tomorrow. I feel like I have nothing to wear, but I'll figure out something. It's just now occurring to me that I should take some things to the laundromat while there's still time.

I battle a kind of loneliness some days--I'm beginning to realize that I take my friends for granted more than I thought. But mostly, I'm in love with this solitude. I sleep when I want, get up when I want, eat what I want, watch what I want. I can spend all day reading or go for walks and I don't have anybody around me to tell we what to do. Nonetheless, the "not having people around me" part of that is only worth it part of the time. I need to start being social, but lately I fail at it.

I finally got an opportunity to watch the sun come up over Lake Michigan. I live so close to the beach; it seems ridiculous that it took me this long to see it under any circumstances. It was completely incredible. And it was so nice to wear a sweater. I haven't been able to even look at one since I left. And even so, I had to take it off by the time I was walking home at eight a.m.

I'm really looking forward to autumn. It was my favorite season even in San Diego, and it has to be ten times as beautiful here. Besides, I really miss sleeping underneath blankets.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

You Are The Queen and King Combining Everything Intertwining Like a Ring Around the Finger of a Girl

First thing, and for the record, I am not out of the woods by any means. But after a couple of weeks watching my situation worsen by the minute, I am finally in a position to let it improve, albeit slowly, and just run damage control.

After two or three weeks of slaving at the feet of our bullshit economic state and handing out resumes as though they were coupons for five-dollar hoagies, I finally landed a job. I filled out the application to work at Border's online, and after a week or so of pestering them, they finally offered me a position. It's pretty ideal, actually--it's quite within walking distance from home, it probably won't suck the marrow from my bones in an attempt to form me into a corporate zombie robot, everyone I've met there seems cool, and it's right next door to my favorite coffee shop--a place called The Broadway (guess what street it's on), owned and operated by Kemp and A.J., two brothers from Kenya who are both completely rad.

So, now the only problem is finding a way to pay all my bills within two weeks, while I don't know when I'm getting paid or how much. The hunt for a second job is already on; I'm looking a little more selectively now, trying to find another job that will allow me to work at my own pace--data entry, freelance work, anything like that. At least, that's how it's going to pan out until I get a feel for the hours at Border's.

I was talking to my friend Tom from back home who laughed and said, "You moved to Chicago to work at Border's." How true is that? Not very glamorous, to be sure, but at least now, with some money in my pocket and a load off my shoulders, I can finally get out and enjoy Chicago.

Lately, I've just been planted on my futon (which has to be about the most uncomfortable piece of furniture I've ever owned) in front of the fan reading and watching TV. My friend, Brandon, from Las Vegas and I have started writing an original screenplay as well, which I should really be working on right this minute.

The sun sets directly outside my window every night, and right now the residual light is barely showing among the clouds as it gets darker. Unfortunately, it's going to stay the same temperature for the rest of the night. I can't wait until I can sleep with blankets on again.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

I'm a Man of Means By No Means

Since moving into my studio, I haven't had much time to settle into it. It doesn't feel like home yet. But it's nice to have my own space and my own things around me.

The stress sets in whenever I'm here, as it becomes more and more evident that if I don't find a job very, very soon, I won't be in this place longer than a month and then I'll have an eviction on my record and will never be able to find another apartment again. It goes without saying that I haven't been getting much sleep.

I'm doing everything I can to stay positive and work as hard as possible to fix my situation. I've been devoting all my time to walking around my neighborhood and the bordering ones, just applying everywhere I can think of.

I applied for unemployment as well, and got a call from them today. They were just trying to clarify some information so I didn't get a sense of whether I'm going to qualify for benefits, but it's a good sign, I think.

I don't know where I'm going to be in a month, but that's part of the adventure, right?

Right?

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

It Goes Like This, The Fourth, The Fifth, The Minor Fall and the Major Lift

So, the not having a job is bad and that situation hasn't improved. But as I've said, it would be much easier to fix if I had a roof over my head and access to my clothes and a shower and whatnot.

Which is why I'm ecstatic to announce that ten minutes ago, I was approved to move into a tiny studio in Uptown, which will provide me with all those things. I move in tomorrow. Thank goodness.

So now, it's just a matter of getting myself into the apartment, unloading my stuff from my car, and beginning to set up my life. Once that's done, probably tomorrow or the next day, then I get to spend every waking moment searching for a job. And if I get one by next month, all my worries will be gone. All the big ones, anyway.

Right now, it's 77 degrees outside with 84% humidity, and it's raining. I still don't understand the weather, but I love it.